Why am I passionate about this?

I have been fascinated with mental health since long before I was officially diagnosed with Bipolar I. Even as an elementary schooler, I recognized that I was different from my peers: I thought more deeply and often more darkly, I experienced higher highs and lower lows, often beyond my control, and I very rarely discussed my home life. Writing became a logical and perhaps life-saving outlet as soon as I learned to put words into letters (mostly the wrong letters, but thank God for spell-check). 


I wrote...

How Everything Turns Away

By Steven J. Kolbe,

Book cover of How Everything Turns Away

What is my book about?

After a life-altering manic episode, FBI agent Ezra James is placed on administrative leave and must figure out life in…

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The books I picked & why

Book cover of An Unquiet Mind: A Memoir of Moods and Madness

Steven J. Kolbe Why did I love this book?

I loved this book, which I read shortly after recovering from my first major manic episode. I remember sitting on the patio of the LSU student union and thinking, “Yes, this!” again and again.

Written by a medical doctor (a psychiatrist), this memoir offers a unique view of bipolar disorder as Jamison herself has bipolar. I needed to know more about my diagnosis, and I needed to hear it from someone who had experienced it herself. 

By Kay Redfield Jamison,

Why should I read it?

5 authors picked An Unquiet Mind as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

An Unquiet Mind is a definitive examination of manic depression from both sides: doctor and patient, the healer and the healed. A classic memoir of enormous candour and courage, it teems with the wit and wisdom of its writer, Dr Kay Redfield Jamison.

With an introduction by Andrew Solomon, writer and lecturer on psychology and culture.

'It stands alone in the literature of manic depression for its bravery, brilliance and beauty.' - Oliver Sacks

I was used to my mind being my best friend. Now, all of a sudden, my mind had turned on me: it mocked me for my…


Book cover of The Catcher in the Rye

Steven J. Kolbe Why did I love this book?

I have read this book repeatedly in my life, the first time as a high school junior and the most recent time as I entered my thirties, and every time, I understand the plight of Holden Caulfield a little bit better.

Poorly attached to his family (who mostly ignore him), poorly attached to his friends (who change as often as he changes boarding schools), and still grieving for the loss of his brother, Holden attempts to take on life independently in Manhattan, of all places, with predictably disastrous results.

As someone who lived in four different states and had five different family arrangements before my sophomore year in high school, I identified heavily with Holden. That sense of kinship has only grown over the years. 

By J.D. Salinger,

Why should I read it?

20 authors picked The Catcher in the Rye as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

After leaving prep school Holden Caulfield spends three days on his own in New York City.


Book cover of The Bell Jar

Steven J. Kolbe Why did I love this book?

This novel gets a bad rap, but I found it quite funny. If you have personally struggled with a mental health disorder, then I think it is easy and rewarding to find the humor in it. Perhaps my favorite moment is when Esther Greenwood is wandering around her house with a string following behind her like a cat’s tail.

It is the contrast of absolute darkness and humorous light that makes this one so hopeful to me. Yet, it never dismisses the stark reality of Esther’s condition. Both are present. 

By Sylvia Plath,

Why should I read it?

16 authors picked The Bell Jar as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

I was supposed to be having the time of my life.

When Esther Greenwood wins an internship on a New York fashion magazine in 1953, she is elated, believing she will finally realise her dream to become a writer. But in between the cocktail parties and piles of manuscripts, Esther's life begins to slide out of control. She finds herself spiralling into depression and eventually a suicide attempt, as she grapples with difficult relationships and a society which refuses to take women's aspirations seriously.

The Bell Jar, Sylvia Plath's only novel, was originally published in 1963 under the pseudonym Victoria…


Book cover of A Long Way Down

Steven J. Kolbe Why did I love this book?

On New Year's Eve, four Londoners climb to the top of a high rise with the same intention. They've all come for different reasons, but their plan is the same. Instead of ending their lives, however, they save each other. 

I love this novel, which is perhaps the truest and most hopeful story about suicide I’ve read. The final scene, which takes place on the one-year anniversary of the opening scene, is something I think of at least once a year, and I am always shaken by its insight. At times, side-splittingly funny and heart-rendingly sad, this is a must-read for anyone recovering from a mental illness. 

By Nick Hornby,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked A Long Way Down as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

“One New Year’s Eve, four people with very different reasons but a common purpose find their way to the top of a fifteen-story building in London. None of them has calculated that, on a date humans favor for acts of significance, in a place known as a local suicide-jumpers’ favorite, they might encounter company. A Long Way Down is the story of what happens next, and of what doesn’t.”  —The New York Times Book Review

A wise, affecting novel from the beloved, award-winning author of Dickens and Prince, Funny Girl and High Fidelity

Nick Hornby mines the hearts and psyches…


Book cover of The Perks of Being a Wallflower

Steven J. Kolbe Why did I love this book?

This coming-of-age novel has everything: love, grunge music, angst, and a slow revelation of past trauma. I don't think I speak for everyone with mental health issues, but I know that having a traumatic childhood is a common, shared factor amongst people with serious diagnoses. I read this one before I understood why I identified so strongly with it.

Charlie lives on the fringes, barely dipping a toe into the social melee that is high school life, yet, with courage and determination, he carves out a place for himself. While his new friendships allow him to find himself, they also allow him the safety to confront the wounds of his past, wounds too large for even his teenage self to come to grips with. 

Even though my last manic episode was over sixteen years ago, I am only recently doing the real work of processing and understanding the traumatic experiences that contributed to it. Chbosky’s classic is a great reminder that we don't always see what's beneath the surface, but we must deal with it if we want to have any hope of recovering. 

By Stephen Chbosky,

Why should I read it?

18 authors picked The Perks of Being a Wallflower as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it. This book is for kids age 14, 15, 16, and 17.

What is this book about?

A modern cult classic, a major motion picture and a timeless bestseller, The Perks of Being a Wallflower is a deeply affecting coming-of-age story.

Charlie is not the biggest geek in high school, but he's by no means popular.

Shy, introspective, intelligent beyond his years, caught between trying to live his life and trying to run from it, Charlie is attempting to navigate through the uncharted territory of high school. The world of first dates and mixed tapes, family dramas and new friends. The world of sex, drugs, and music - when all one requires to feel infinite is that…


Explore my book 😀

How Everything Turns Away

By Steven J. Kolbe,

Book cover of How Everything Turns Away

What is my book about?

After a life-altering manic episode, FBI agent Ezra James is placed on administrative leave and must figure out life in a quieter position: head of security at a Catholic school.

When the new, beautiful student-teacher is found half-dead and two months pregnant, Ezra is drawn back into the world of crime scenes and interrogations he thought he left behind.

Book cover of An Unquiet Mind: A Memoir of Moods and Madness
Book cover of The Catcher in the Rye
Book cover of The Bell Jar

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Book cover of What You Made Me Do

Barbara Gayle Austin Author Of What You Made Me Do

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What is my book about?

Willem and Jurriaan have a miserable childhood thanks to their cruel, controlling mother—Louisa Veldkamp, a world-renowned pianist. Dad turns a blind eye. One day, Louisa vanishes without a trace during a family vacation.

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An expectant mother gets more than she bargained for when she marries into a seemingly perfect family in this gripping debut novel–a must read for fans of A. J. Finn and B. A. Paris.

After surviving a nightmarish childhood, Anneliese Bakker is on the mend and searching for her birth mother. But when she meets Willem, she falls madly in love and finally finds a safe place to land. Engaged and expecting her first child, she moves into the Veldkamp mansion on a stately, tree-lined avenue in Amsterdam. And yet, nothing about Willem’s family is as it seems. Instead of…


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